(editor's note: Photo is of the author of this post, pictured in the 1994 year book as "Teacher's Pet")~For Mr. Coate~
As a junior high student, I had already heard the stories. Any middle school kid with an older sibling knew all about the horror to come! Freshmen Biology with Mr Coate! I mean, as if being a freshmen weren't scary enough, he definitely added to the "fear factor"! I remember the first day of class being on pins and needles like never before. "He's so strict, stand-offish, and cold", I thought at first. I never could have imagined on that first day
of class just how wrong I would turn out to be. By the time I was a graduating senior, Mr. Coate had become not just a mentor, but also someone who not only took interest in me, but really listened, and always cared.
I will say that after thirteen years since graduation, and nearly seventeen since that first day of high school, that I didn't think I could recall much more than about a handful of really "stand-out" memories to share for this book. As I worked on trying to put into words the few memories that had easily come to mind, all these buried memories rose to the surface and I realized just how many little "stand-out" memories there were with Mr.
Coate. I also realized that I wouldn't be able to share as many as I'd like or this book would be incredibly long. Instead, I've attempted to summarize in a few paragraphs all that I would want him to know.
He was just a complete constant for me. Always noticing when something was wrong and letting me know he was there to talk, whether or not it was of academic concern. I would find myself going in to talk before school, or just after lunch. To this day, I can't recall what much of the conversation was about. I don't even remember if I reached out to him or if that intuitiveness he had led him to bring up a topic with me. What I do remember
is that same feeling I used to get when I replay those somewhat fuzzy memories back in my head. It is one of safety, comfort, and loyalty; his commitment to my well-being by never turning away his ear. That's what I'll remember most about our conversations.
Because of his willingness to listen, I trusted. I trusted that he could see things in me that I just couldn't believe were true. You see, I was a good student, but not without serious effort. I remember my mom explained it to me this way once, "Your brothers are naturally smart. Schoolwork comes easy to them. You get good grades because you are an overachiever." Therefore, I couldn't believe it when I was inducted into the "National Honor Society". Even though I had the grades, I still didn't think I was "smart enough". I would constantly compare myself, and my grades, to my smarter brother or my best friend's, the valedictorian of our class. It was Mr. Coate who made me realize that I had to stop comparing myself to others and just do my personal best. Somehow he did make me realize that, and because he had faith that I was smart enough, I had faith too.
This brings me to my favorite memory... the "Lab Practical". I must say that really I am not a science person. Science has always been difficult for me to "get". I struggled through cell division, hated doing pedigrees, and don't even get me started about the many dissections or bugs to collect. I guess some things were fascinating, but all in all, it just wasn't my thing. I feared the lab practical because of how huge it seemed! So much
information to learn, it just wasn't possible. I wasn't smart enough. Through his faith in me, Mr. Coate somehow found a way to get me to challenge this insecurity. With some early mornings, many late nights, and a lot of flash cards, I somehow managed to get the top grade in a class that was full of exceptionally bright students. My favorite memory begins the morning after the "big test". I was walking down to my locker, just several feet away from his door. There he was, as usual, just to the right of his doorway, observing the chaos of the halls in the morning. But that day he looked different to me, and his smile seemed to be aimed in my direction. As I neared my locker, I saw what appeared to be something shiny. It was, in fact, the shiniest cardboard I had ever seen. Cut in the shape of a star and hand-painted gold, it donned the words "Slide Test Champ" in that infamous
handwriting. It was the most spectacular piece of cardboard I had ever seen! I cannot explain how I felt at that moment because it was simply indescribable. I have never been so proud of myself! How do you put into words that feeling you get when you know that you can achieve anything if you believe in yourself enough. I give credit to the teacher who first believed that I had it in me, who encouraged me to never give up on myself, and rewarded my accomplishments with extraordinary praise.
One thing I always knew I wanted to be was a mom. I've spent the last ten years watching my girls grow, and have been blessed to have had the opportunity to stay home with each of them at least part of the time. I've held several different office jobs, and started running a successful cake-business with my Mom in 2001. When my husband went back to school to finish his degree, I realized that this is the year that my second child starts kindergarten, and it will be a mere three years before my final "baby" will be starting school. I asked myself what I would do once I wasn't "needed" as much at home. I started looking into career options for myself again. I thought that with some time and life/work experience since high school I would have an easier time deciding the career path for my future. I've not found it to be easier at all. If anything, it is harder because I am facing so many factors I didn't even have to consider when I was first attending college. I didn't have a husband or children to think about back then, and they are greatly affected (and greatly affect) every decision I make.
The fact is, I am still trying to decide what I should "do with my life", and for several years now I've worried that I am a disappointment to Mr. Coate because he's yet to receive my college graduation invitation. If there is one thing that I would want him to know it would be that I haven't given up on myself. That even though I still have doubts about whether or not I'm smart enough, or if I have the endurance enough to go back to school, his voice is always in my head. The same one that believed in me and wouldn't let me accept any less than my best. Even through my struggles today, I draw on that. I may not "know what I want to be when I grow up" other than the best at what I already am. A devoted wife and mother who strives to be the best at those two things, and never gives up on keeping her eyes open for "what's next". I just keep praying that God will eventually show me how I can use my creative talents and my compassion for others to guide me toward where I should be in life. If that leads me to a degree and a paycheck, I'll be grateful. If it leads me to a life of voluntary work where the only form of payment is an occasional "warm fuzzy" or a smile, I will be blessed. The most important thing is not what I do, but how I live my life and what my children learn from me.
I just want Mr. Coate to know that all of his efforts did not get lost on me. Although I may never pursue a career in science, I am confident that I will further my education in some field. I just don't know when that will be. My hope is that he doesn't feel cheated by not getting to see me graduate and make that walk. I do know that whether he knows it or not, he has already been witness to the most important walk of my life. The one I took from the back of the church to stand next to my best friend in front of God. I'm not sure if I ever told him how devastated I would have been if he hadn't been able to witness that, or how much it meant to me that he was there.
I was among the last graduating class of MACON HIGH SCHOOL. Home of the Ironmen! Revisiting high school has been different since the year after I graduated because of the consolidation with Blue Mound. The name changed, the school colors changed, even some of the teachers changed. There was one thing though that always remained constant. Mr. Coate. The name on the building could have changed a hundred times and the school colors could've been rainbow tie-dye, but I always knew that I could walk in the doors, take a left down the hall and find that same teacher with the same stance, in front of that same door or behind that same long desk in that same information packed room. But that room will never be the same after this year. For certain, the school will never be forever changed without his presence, and those of us who were fortunate enough to have learned from him know how truly blessed we are. I hope in our combined efforts to share these memories with him, he knows how truly special he is.
Marcia Ingle
(Marci Janes)
Class of 1994
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